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Monthly Archives: November 2013

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The Horror of Being a Bridesmaid

November 29, 2013 by thevagenda

I recognise it is unforgivable to say you don’t like being a bridesmaid. The phenomenal honour of being part of anyone’s Special Day is supposed to short circuit such selfish notions; we maids are meant to operate en masse, with smiles fixed on our faces. I am writing this anonymously because I still have to […]

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The Evening Standard Thinks Your Naked Body is a Prop to Sell Handbags With

November 29, 2013 by thevagenda

What with The Sun being the country’s best selling newspaper, coming face to face with bare boobs on public transport is hardly a rarity, though I have to say at least The Sun doesn’t lop off their owner(s) faces. Last week I was treated with this lovely image from the Evening Standard’s Deluxe Magazine. It’s a […]

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Fuck This Fucking Juice Diet, Seriously

November 28, 2013 by thevagenda

Do you want to lose weight? Do you want your body to be completely cleansed, and nutritionally fit? Do you want that weird, empty feeling you get after doing a poo of having absolutely nothing in your system, at all? But all the time?  Do you want unicorns to fly out of your arse and […]

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Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Sexism in the Film Industry

November 28, 2013 by thevagenda

  (Courtesy of the New York Film Academy)   

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Is Melissa Bachman A Fugly Bitch For Killing A Lion?

November 27, 2013 by thevagenda

For those of you who have had better things to do with your time than monitor Twitter obsessively over the last few days, please allow me to explain the shit that has been going down in SA. Melissa Bachman is an American TV presenter, well known for her love of hunting; a self-proclaimed ‘huntress’ since […]

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How Lifestyle Blogs Took Over From Mags in Making Me Feel Like Shit

November 25, 2013 by thevagenda

  It all started with a cake. A salted caramel chocolate cake. My boyfriend’s birthday was looming and I’d seen the recipe on Pinterest. Never mind that I didn’t own a sugar thermometer, or that it would take me a good five hours, split over two days, to construct the bloody thing, I needed this […]

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You’ve Got Male – Unravelling the Myth of Online Dating

November 25, 2013 by thevagenda

‘My interests include men who can’t get a date with women their own age, nights in on the sofa and not wearing clothes’     I am recently very single, having broken up with the person who I thought was the love of my life over summer. I went from gliding around like a girl […]

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How Boris Johnson Has Ruined Your Sex Life

November 21, 2013 by thevagenda

Terrible news for all kindred spirits who have used the early closing time of the Tube to bolster your romantic relations: it has been announced that the London Underground will run for 24 hours at weekends by 2015. The lines that will run a service after midnight are restricted to the Victoria, Jubilee, and certain […]

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Why You Should Stop Taking His Porn So Personally, You Uptight, Insecure Harridan

November 21, 2013 by thevagenda

    Ah, Vice magazine. We all love a bit of Vice, amiright? But this latest piece by Betty Burns has led us to question just how exactly they choose items to feature and where they find people to interview because, quite frankly, this quite literally blows. Did they find this book in the bargain […]

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Failing Universities Compared to Mediocre Teenage Girl in Denial About Her Looks

November 21, 2013 by thevagenda

In this morning’s first segment of ‘what the fuck? It’s 2013′ news, we came across this lovely article courtesy of the Times Higher Education team, in which failing universities are compared with mediocre-looking teenage girls in denial about their prospects. Just in case that wasn’t dispiriting enough to all those young women out there tempted […]

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The Power of the Selfie

November 20, 2013 by thevagenda

I take selfies like Coleridge took opium: daily and in vast quantities. Not out of vanity. I am, after all, a woman who thinks nothing of talking to someone she fancies while wearing potato-printed pyjamas, a sheepskin coat, size 13 wellies and pouring coffee into my starkly un made-up face. No, I take selfies because […]

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Boy George and My Thigh Gap

November 18, 2013 by thevagenda

It’s 1999. I am eleven years old and have recently started at my secondary school where the uniform is a red and white striped shirt, reminiscent of a strawberry campino, a grey A-line skirt and a royal blue blazer two sizes too big for me. So far, so single sex school. I am happily strolling […]

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